i hate spam!

yes. i hate spam! you know how normal email service providers like yahoo or gmail will sort out those mails that they think is spam or junk and normally it's quite accurate except for the occasional friend's email getting lost in the pile. but i tell you, this university mail of mine, very stupid eh, i think got more junk mail that actual emails! i already set the security level to higher than normal and yet so much rubbish comes my way. i don't quite understand how does my unimail get caught in the network of junk mails anyways. not like i simply go use my unimail to subsribe to stuff or anything. i hardly even use it. so since i forwarded the unimail to my yahoo account, everyday i'm bombarded with ample of junk! junk i tell ya! and there doesn't seem to be anything i can do about it. i actually thought of sending an email to the IT people in the uni see if they can help me sensor junk mails but to imagine so many people wanting them to do that they would have been overwhelmed! guess i have to live with it until i leave melbourne university. the good thing is i check my email like a million times everyday since it's work or uni related, so i can just delete them as i carry on with my daily life. oh but think of it, if they ever sent me junk mails about job offer, maybe that will catch my interest? anyone wanna offer me a job? just email me!

i like! u like?

there! how is this one for a change? of course i just cut and paste most of the things from the original template because i can't be bothered or more like don't have the time to make my own. i can barely find the time to blog.

i think i must be too pre-occupied with sleeping! thinking of work makes me tired. when i tired i feel like sleeping. sleep so that don't need to think about work. see the vicious cycle? i'm beginning to think am i cut out to be in research? i may be good with studies, well, even that i'm not excellent but in the field of research, good doesn't seem to be enough. i'm "excellent" according to my supervisor. everyone in my lab likes me. i like being there too! really helpful and diverse personalities in just one lab. but do i really like what i'm doing? i think this must be the negativity talking. i hate it when the results is not what it's meant to look like. sometimes i think too much.

now now, let's think of the positives. i'm almost finish with honours. just another 3 more months and it's over! at least for this year that is. i admit i'm a slacker that's why i like this field. at the moment i can come in anytime and leave at anytime. if i had a 9 to 5 job, i don't think i'll be able to stand it! i'll have to have like 3 coffee breaks per day!

i need to be more hardworking from today onwards. my motivation to be great not just good. sometimes i put pressure on myself but this is what you got to do to achieve great things. i should still believe that the amount of effort you put into your work pays off at the end of the day. though it may not be always through but it is most of the time.

play hard, work hard!

temporary out of service

my...i'm so bad with the template and code and html stuff. so the background will temporary be in revision. now it's plain old boring background.

3 years and counting

happy anniversary my dear! though sometimes you may be the most annoying person in the world, it means something to be able to share our life journey together. if anything, we're growing and learning all the time. i used to be one of those people who says i like you for who you are but i think in a relationship you have to learn when to adapt. when to evolve. when to give in. the funny thing is that we tend to learn each other's habit. name callings. expressions. at the end of the day, not knowing who started it! and i like it whenever you surprise me with those little things, those little things that i mentioned once upon a time ago and you still remember. yet i still doubt you think what i do for you is special. since you can't even remember the important events. you may not be the most romantic person in the world but i guess you just have a different way of ticking.

but you're still the worst housemate i ever got! but because i'm so kind, or perhaps, i can't stand the mess, i clean up after you. should not pamper you so much, you know? after become habit eh. three years, is that long? does time really say it all? to me, it doesn't. there's still so much to learn. there's still so much we could improve on. sometimes you just want to be naive and think you'll just get into a relationship and it'll be prefect the way it is. how often do you get that? i'm sure there's always ups and downs. though it's my bad that i always remember the bad things clearer but i would definitely say there's more ups than downs at the moment.

stuff it.

stuff it. i'm not good at writing and all sorts. i seriously don't have creative juice flowing within me. no wonder i'm not an artist. or an architect. or a pianist (or in my case, electonist maybe?) or any other sort of thing that needs creativity. i like art-y stuff. i love them all. but i'm just not good at any. i admire those who can, those who are, i really do. sometimes even envious at their abilities. wonder what i could blame on me being the way i am? perhaps i'm not good at writing because i don't read much. if i don't read, i don't stimulate my mind often enough so i won't have the ability to think, to analyse situation impromptu. or maybe i'm just so dull. so dull and boring that i can't seem to find excitement in life. things that are worth writing about. but of course i still think it's me. because if i'm creative, if i'm capable, i should be able to turn those things that past me by each day into something interesting. if i read enough books, i'm sure i'll eventually get lots more ideas and inspiration.

any mocha lovers out there?

are you a mocha lover? if you're not, you're missing out! now i'm gonna try a lame attempt to convince you to like mocha.

coffee lovers say that coffee is meant to have the hint of bitterness. if coffee is taken sweet...there's not really a point to take coffee then would there? but then what about frappe and all that? hardly bitter one? what about iced coffee? traditional ice coffee got ice cream one...so also not bitter wat?



chocolate lovers normally like chocolate, solely. they have a hot drink not because they need the caffeine. but then sometimes chocolate can be too sweet right? and there wouldn't be much option to change the level of sweetness right?

but i love both, so maybe that's why i opt for mocha. chocolate-y taste with the dose of caffeine. not too sweet, not too bitter, just right. taste good hot or cold.

anyhow, even if you don't like mocha, it's your lost! but now the gals at st.vincent's, we're all loving our mocha! yay!

spotting fog/mist...

where can you see fog/mist?

• at genting highlands...only early early in the morning or maybe when's it's cloudy/rainy weather.
• at cameron highlands...but don't know now still as cold or not since i haven't been there since i was 10 years old.
• on the north-south highway...going up north...at wee hours in the morning...that's when my dad normally travel to balik kampung.
• when malaysia got jerebu...of a different sort
• during WINTER in melbourne...day...noon...and night...but then this is like a combination. eventhough foggy because it's cold but then still can smell smoky air wor...what does that mean? if so cold until got fog/mist how come can got smoke smell one?

there you go, the sign that winter this year is going to be cold. or it could be the fact that my house doesn't have good insulation. imagine how when u breathe, in the house, also can got vapour eh.

what's ur fav colour?

the greatest bunch!

i'm referring to our group of honours student at st.vincent's campus. i honestly think we're like the coolest bunch of students compared to those that are on other off-campus or on-campus locations! firstly, i would definitely say even though we're a much smaller group of students compared to other departments, we're definitely more close knit than others. especially the other four gals in the same student room as me, what's more two of them are actually sort of in my lab too! i think honours year has been great so far, with most assignments spaced out evenly and not too hectic, despite having to be in the lab or be around most of the days. i must say i must be one of the most slacking person of all! cuz i always come in late but i do stay back late when i'm doing some stuff down in the lab. other people their supervisor are sort of expect them to be there from 9 till 5. but my lab people, as long as you get your work done, no matter where are you it's ok. *grinz* hence the coming in late because i work from home late at night then next morning don't want to wake up! hah! did i say among the gals in the student room, i'm the only asian? so i'm really greatful that they treat me the same, just like one of them! we hang out, we have lunch, we go for coffee breaks, talk crap etc. etc. it does feel good to belong. like some of my friends because they're the only one in the lab, they don't really have people to hang out with, end up eating lunch alone, you know, stuff like that. of course i don't go and boast about how much i like my place la. what's more, i have a senior in my lab and she's doing Phd now so i always go bug her about stuff. ehehe...she always say "how come you all so happening one." i do always invite her to joint us but then i think she a bit pai seh. even though she senior but then she same age as the rest of us ma. but then she very hardworking so she doesn't waste time doing nonsense like us. ahaha! then got the RA in my lab, he's super super helpful! he moved his 'desk' from upstairs to the lab so almost all the time besides doing surgery, he will be on his workstation in the lab. always anything also go to him "michael..." "michael...". sometimes also pai seh every little things also go ask him for confirmation but then better confirm than do wrong right? i can't believe he's my mom's age! looks younger than that. also also, whenever i go over to the pathology lab for tissue processing and embedding, the people there very very friendly. always come and talk to me. ahaha..eventhough some of them i also don't remember their name but then still can chat! then i think they also don't remember my name so we don't ask and will not know forever! kidding! so i guess you can see that i'm quite happy where i am and i feel fortunate to be surrounded by friendly and helpful people. now the only think is...do i really want to be working on diabetes stuff for my Phd? if you get a project that you really interested in but then the people you don't know if you'll work well with or not for the next 4 years, is it worth while? Project or People? Project or People?

is it just me?

is it just me? it is just me who have close guy friends? is it wrong to have guy as close friends? do u think they always have utter intentions? but what if you've known them for years! do u think being friends for so long that they would still think that there's any sort of attraction besides being compatible as friends? i mean if there is in the first place and being so close would mean that that sort of behaviour would be told to each other honestly from the beginning. obviously, all sort of things would have to be cleared. or else would you have remains close if the attraction was not mutual? being able to talk about anything under the sky, being there in times of needs, is that wrong at all? does it mean that all you can have when you're in a relationship is each other? oh wait, if only i was in an all gal school. then of course i will have close gal friends! it's not that i'm saying i don't have any but it's the matter of compatibility i would say. it's just my nature. that people feel comfortable talking about stuff regardless of our gender. and i would love to think the same too. but what if it's too troublesome for you, would you still have close friends of the other gender? who would you choose? what would you do? it's just me. i just can't keep away from guys. hah! take that! and yet, i still care, i still care about what you think. even though it upsets me so much, so much it hurts. it is all worth it? why can't you just accept me the way i am? can't you see it's my nature...it's just who i am...

of cookies and cupcakes

when i have my own house...i wanna make sure it has a beautiful functional oven! i tried baking cupcakes with my malfunctioned oven today and it turned out to be more like cookies! nice and crunchy cookie top with cake-y bottom. what a disaster! i'm never gonna try baking with this oven ever again...why does it not maintain at the required temperature? i think this is worst than the microwave 'oven' we had last year. at least with the spinning plate in the microwave...the muffins would only get pulled towards the centre while it's cooking...but this one. temperature always gets too high...forcing me to keep opening the oven door. this actually affects the cooking time as well...and still ended up with crunchy cupcakes! cupcakes should remain cupcakes. soft and moist. not crunchy cookies. i got so frustrated at the end product...i threw it out...eventhough it pass for yummy cookies. hah!

p/s: now i think maybe that's a bit of a waste...since it was filled with nutella eh...too bad...too late.

does size matter?

among the cutiez

sunshine after the rain

i think that best describes the situation. it's so nice to know that not everyone is an idiot. it's so nice to know there's someone with a common sense. it's so nice to know that someone actually take their responsibility seriously. it's so nice that someone actually takes the effort to find out the cause of the problem. it's so nice to know that someone actually explained to those idiots of my situation. thanks to this someone, now i have my visa granted till march 2008. see, this someone is even considerate enough to make it till then so that i can have time to decide what i'm gonna do after i graduate. thank you so much! i cannot begin to describe my gratitude! i cannot begin to describe how grateful i am that you've saved me all those trouble in the distant future! thank you thank you thank you!

freaking unbelievable

it's freaking unbelievable i tell you! remember the stupid x-ray? well, it's back to haunt me for the rest of my life. i seriously don't understand what is their freaking problem! remember i said that the doctor said that my x-ray was fine? just some old scarring that who knows how i got it but it does not pose any risk to me or any other person. nothing that i can do about it and there's nothing to be done. now. because of all this medical stupidity, my student visa will only be granted till 4 september 2007! what the...! what's the point? and i went to the immigration thinking that it must have been a typo error since my enrolment clearly says till end of december...and they told me, "oh. because of your medical condition. it's only valid till then. and you have to make a new visa and undergo another medical examination when it expires...to extend for the remaining months"!! tell me...is that stupid or what!! so i have to pay another AUD 400 ++ for a new visa just for two months and AUD 150+ to go through another stupid medical examination at the same stupid place! i seriously can't believe it. it makes no sense to me at all...all i can do now is wait till anzac day is over and hopefully talk to the people i need to to see if this is reversible. all because of a stupid x-ray! super frustrated at all the idiots in the world right now...

i hate trains

why i hate trains? simple! because they are plain stupid. ahaha! although i hate them so much...i still take them because it's nearer to my house and it's faster to get to my study place compared to the tram. i hate trams too because travelling from moonee ponds to st vincent's in tram is way too long. it makes me dizzy because the tram keeps stopping. now back to why i hate trains so much. first of all, although i have the timetable with me i still tend to miss the train every now and then. if i come out late from the house of course i can't blame the train but there's this few times i came out just on time and i saw the train went off! no. it's not because i was late...it's because the train was early by two minutes! and it just left without me! then there are the times when u wait and wait then they announce over the PA "the train departing from platform 1 has been delayed by x mins. connex apologizes for the incovenience". there's another time they announced "the x:xx time train has been canceled due to act of vandalism". also sometimes they bring back out the super old trains with checquered sits and opened window! going through a tunnel underground with open windows! how cool is that? what about the times where the train is so so packed that you can barely fit in anymore but people still push their way in? i mean i can understand why they would do that because train only comes every 20-30 mins so if it was me, i would push too i guess? remember the saying "packed like sardins in a can" ? well i think this is much worse than that! because at least the sardins in the can still got water or oil to swim in but us taking the train during super super peak hours or when there's trains delayed, it's worst than being sardins in a can. i could hardly breathe just now. so so stuffy with all the tall guys around me. it's not nice to be packed up like that especially at the end of the day when ppl start to smell. no offense. i'm sure everyone does. coming back from work. so there. i hate trains. i hate trams. yet i have to take them. unless i have a car that is. ahaha!

what's with the new layout?

i'll tell you what's with the new layout! it was totally unintentional. i was just browsing looking for a new layout and how it would look like and the smart me forgotten to save the old template first. and not knowing that the new ones already saved! so i couldn't really be bothered to go try and look for my old layout again. hope you don't find it too much. ahaha! well, it's kinda nice i guess. bright and flowery. hmm...

what a week!

yes! finally got the first assignment out of the way! that five days of easter break was not even a break at all. cuz all of us had to work on our literature review which was due on friday. plus i was so smart to tell my supervisor that he's way lenient on us so he gave us a deadline to hand in a draft by that monday which i did...almost completed but worked my ass off and just almost managed to get the whole thing through...was too mentally exhausted by then. and all was good when it came back to me the next day with nothing but good comments. well, at least i know i was certainly on the right track and my easter break was well spent on my assignment. and and...this is the first time ever that i almost fully completed my assignment like 5 days before the due date! and first time ever i handed in draft copy! but yet in the end had to spend the next few days with the remainder of the paragraphs. and learned that i had to write an abstract too. and stupid endnote kept stuffing up! it was a frustrating period...but it's all over now! ahaha! well at least for two weeks i hope cuz no major assignments coming up for another two weeks! woo hoo!

and just in case any of you were still wondering about my medical condition...the doctor said it's all clear. but i'm still waiting on my visa approval though. even after approved i have to reapply for my working visa to finally get paid again. i have been working without pay for more than 1 1/2 months now. wow...when i finally get to claim back my working hours...i'll be rich again! as of now, i'm quite broke. i think i've been spending more but i just have no idea where's all the money have gone to. and no, i didn't spend it on shopping cuz i was too busy to go shopping. and no, not on movies too. no time. maybe also cuz i ate out more...no time to pack lunch...stay late so eat out. ahaha! but then how much can i be spending on food rite? and yes. no time to keep record of what i spend on hence the not-knowing-where-my-money went to. hah!

now all i can think of is. what should i be spending my time on now that i'm free!

i wanna watch movie!

i wanna go shopping! [but no money now]

i wanna bake cheesecake! [just baked today, cooling off for the night]

i wanna clean my room!

i wanna do my laundry! [which have been overflowing from the laundry basket]

i think i should just take a rest now...all the other things can wait. all i want now is to go out and take a break! just sit down and have coffee or take a walk without any destination in mind.

happy easter y'all

hey hey! just dropped by to wish y'all happy easter! for those in aussie, happy easter break! though i reckoned most of us have assignments to be completed but heck, it's still a break from going to uni right? at least you can work at your own pace, sleep and wake up anytime you want too! as for me, yes, have to be writing my literature review by monday! ahaha! i'll be back end of the week! till then, take care!! muakz muakz!

what it all comes down to.

i've not been having a streak of luck this few days. first it was the fact that my dell laptop has weird dimensions which led me to believe that it could fit into a crumpler notebook case. it would actually fit if not for the 1 cm wider in the middle due to its curvy design! cuz the smart me measured the sides thinking that it's all square and all. but heck, at least eugene's computer could fit in it because his new laptop has the widescreen dimension. it hugs perfectly! and it's too nice for me to go exchange it for something second best. ehehe.

on another serious matter, i have not gotten my visa approved due to stupid medical examination. i've waited two weeks for them to tell me i have to go for further check up because they noticed something on my chest x-ray. not only do i have to wait for them to forward the x-ray to another clinic where i'm supposed to be doing my further test, i have to wait for that clinic to sent me an appointment time. i think they think that their postal is so good that things urgent like medical stuff can just be sent through snail mail! so the stupid me went to tell my parents that my visa is still waiting upon my medical results and that they are suspected that i might have "tuberculosis or other diseases". now i have to make another doctor's appointment at the uni student health services hoping to do another chest x-ray or get a second opinion. tomorrow.

but don't u think it's kinda stupid that if i'm suspected of some sort of disease that they should clarify it as soon as possible. saying, *touchwood* if i do have something that i should get treated immediately rather than let it delay on? how stupid is that? so now i have my mum worrrying about me. i feel bad for making her worry. if i knew she would have taken it so seriously i wouldn't have told her cuz i'm sure she wouldn't be able to sleep until she knows exactly how i am. so with her stressing about me, i also feel stress! decided to not go in to st.vincent's today because not in the mood ar! =p

just want to get away from seeing other ppl reading their material which might stress me up more than i already am. i seriously hope that nothing is wrong with me. by the way, do u know that the BCG shots we took? it's for TB leh. don't tell me the vaccine not effective anymore? or that i contracted some sort of disease from being at the hospital environment too much? sienz....