Some people think that it's better to forget the past so that you can move forward, look ahead at what's install for you in the future. Others may think that although you may be moving on with life, you still can withhold the memories of the past, whether it be a lesson to not repeat the same mistakes or just memories of life that mould you to be who you are now. I'm more of the latter one. It's not like i'm a person who doesn't want to move on and forget about the past or anything, it's just that sometimes, when you are alone, with nothing to do, these memories from the past comes flowing back to your mind and makes you ponder back on the things done or said. I don't know why but i missed my friends, my friends back home and i just wished i could have spent more time with them when i had the chance to, when i was back in Msia. I just wanted to express that every one of you mean something in my life and i don't want to waste the chance to thank you, thank you for being a part of my life, thank you for crossing my path and i just hope that our journey together has not yet reached an end. I realised that i shouldn't be waiting at home, waiting for someone to call me out, anyone at all, hoping that they will remember to call when they are free. Probably didn't want to seem persistent so i just wait and wait and before i know it, i have to be back in Oz already. Then, when i think back, i didn't even get to meet half my friends, even my closest friends. I wished i had more chance to meet up and chat. So, next time when i'm back in Msia, i'll make sure i take the initiative to call people out, i hope.
What other memories am i talking about? Memories of everything good and bad that have happened in the past. Should we just erase the bad and keep the good? I mean if one actually did that, then how can you learn from your mistakes if you don't remember any? But keeping too much of the bad memories can also be detrimental. At times, when i think back of all the mistakes that i've done, i just don't know whether i should regret it or not. But being the ego self, i say to myself that i've never regretted anything that i've done. Whether it be true or not, even i can't tell. Once upon a time ago, i believed that love can be forever but i can no longer believe in that. So i guess that's just to name one thing bad about remembering the past? Then you start thinking back about things like, what if..., i shouldn't have...,i could have...,then something strike you back to the present and you realised the past cannot be changed so what's the point thinking about it. Sometimes i do wish i was never involve in any BGR but then again, those who didn't wish they did. It always seem that what others have is better than your own, hence the proverb "the grass is greener on the other side". It's just human nature to not be satisfied with what they have, they want more, they want things to be better than it already is. How selfish.
*It's just what i think but i'm sure it doesn't apply to all. Didn't mean to offend anyone but it's just what i'm feeling right now*
2 comments:
but then .. when we call them out, they say they're not free and will call us when they're free ..
and when they're free, they don't bother calling us ..
and everytime we call them, they're not free ..
so do we persist? or do we get the hint that they don't care about us?
yes, i definitely agree with you. it's not that we don't want to hang out with them right? so if people say they busy we just say call us when you are free but then they might have forgotten or plain busy? but how can u be too busy for a friend you cherish right? so yeah, i guess we should get the hint. how sad...
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